VT Works

There was a recent post on Facebook that a friend brought to my attention. Although these days, my time on social media is sparse, at best, I tracked down the post to read about a mother who was clearly feeling defeated after realizing her son’s VT home practice assignments are not going well, and she was blaming herself.

Occasionally in Vision Therapy, we encounter the perception of our patient or their parents, that they (or their children) have not made progress during the course of vision therapy.  Their program has been chugging along and here we are 8, 10, 15, maybe even 20 visits in and they don’t notice anything changing. The doctor reassures them that their measurements show improvement, therapists are excited for the advancements occurring in the VT, but the patient or parent just doesn’t see it. Even worse, parents feel like failures because their kids aren’t succeeding at home.

I’m not going to pretend I have all the answers, or even that I’ve discovered the proverbial magic bullet because I don’t, and I haven’t; but to all the parents out there who worry that they have failed their child because their home VT programs aren’t going so well, much like this mom was, I respectfully offer you the thoughts I shared with this mom on social media.

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I’ve got more than 20 years VT under my belt and I can understand that you’re feeling anxious, frustrated, and maybe even a little scared about your son’s progress – or lack of progress. In full respect of your feelings, I’d like to offer you a bit of perspective.

First, please cut yourself and your son some slack. Vision Therapy is not a race nor is it an opportunity to judge one’s parenting skills. We all (Vision Therapists) struggle to find the best activities and to make them work well, especially for our friends in special populations. The important concept is to stay engaged in the process, and to the extent possible, try to ignore the product. At this point, how soon your son reaches the finish line doesn’t matter.

In terms of your son’s program, communicate your thoughts, challenges, and frustrations to your son’s Vision Therapist. We all try hard to find the best solutions, and feedback is welcomed and necessary. The hard part, though, is helping with the parts we cannot see – namely, the success or failure of the home activities. This is why your feedback is so crucial. Your expectations of your son finding success in VT and improving his life are completely within the realm of what your doctor and therapist can manage, and it’s important for you to be an active member of that process. There are many avenues to travel for families who struggle with home activities and finding the best VT solution for your family needs to be a collaborative process.

The last thing I would encourage you to do is consider a true measure and discussion of your expectations. Do you feel like you should be able to perform the VT activities at home in the same manner and with the same level of efficiency as is accomplished in the office? This would be a tall task. In the office, we have the advantage because the kiddos are “coming to our house” which inherently asks them to perform. At home, it’s a much different picture for various reasons. Plus, you’re his mom. Your son will never know a safer and less judgmental place than he feels in your presence. Perhaps his behavior and lack of compliance is just his way of saying “this is hard, and I don’t know how I can succeed”.

All this to say, I encourage you to speak to your son’s Vision Therapist and have a real conversation about how things are going at home and your feelings of frustration and overwhelm. If nothing else, you’ve learned that visual input is hard for your son, and you can use that information both to make his life easier now and to help him succeed down the road – whenever that may be.

Remember what Thomas Edison said: “Just because something doesn’t do what you planned it to do doesn’t mean it’s useless”.